At some point in life, whether it was growing up in the neighborhood, during your school days or maybe even now in the work-world, there’s a person who is deserving of a “snatch”. This person will push and push you to the limit, like Kenya and then act surprised when you snap, like Porsha. That person may think you’re a pushover, naive or passive aggressive. Whatever the reason, while understandable. It’s important to keep your cool (especially at this age…) because assaults come with charges, as Porsha now knows. While it’s sometimes impossible to hold your tongue, it is necessary to be able to control yourself physically, even when being taunted.
Through school, I dealt with some mean girls that would give the meanest mean girl you can think of a run for her money. While some mature and see the error of their ways, others age, with the same pre-teen mind that made them hateful in the first place. Sadly, they pass the bad behavior on their daughters. I see it. Some of the same “mean girls” STILL see me, nearly 20 years later and throw shade. But see, the way my non-chalantness is set up, I laugh about it now, like I laughed about it then. If you haven’t matured since 96′ I feel sorry for you, your man, etc. I was taught not to respond to ignorance, some people don’t know any better, most likely because they were raised by “mean girls” like Kenya. During one of these high school incidents, one young lady said she didn’t like me because I thought I was “better than them..” My father responded in this “mediation”, “She is, she is better than you.” While at the time I thought it was so rude and most definitely going to get me banked on the way to the bus stop. As an adult, I see, he was right. Being “better than” foolishness is not a bad thing. As an adult, I’ve had run-ins with the same “mean girl”… she goes out of her way to show me that she has the same 15 ear old mind she had in 10th grade. Now, I think that’s sad. See, I was taught not to stoop to someone’s level. I’m pretty darn good at taking the high road. Sometimes, even dignifying ignorance with a response makes people think you are bothered. It makes them the satisfaction of feeling like you are on the same level. I’m not saying that in a cocky, conceited, materialistic way. I’m saying that if you want to throw darts at me, cackle across the room and be just flat out rude when I’ve done nothing but “think I’m cute”…and you’re over 30???!!! We are NOT on the same level… You are a child and I don’t argue with children.
Sounds good right???? Unfortunately it’s not always that easy… I certainly need to have that calm, cool collected Carrie in my ear when the anger comes over me. That’s when it becomes hard to practice what I preach, I was almost guilty a few weeks ago, I went to the fashion show at my high school, a young woman in the audience (I’m not sure of her age, because she was bigger than me and had a mouth like an adult)… regardless I lost my cool. She called me a B$%^#, I mean one of those hard, heartfelt, say it with your chest, “B$%#!!!!” My first reaction was to turn around and ask her who she was talking to because I was a grown up….not a child. When she jumped up and tried to push past people to get me me, my second thought was to snatch her. lol! Thank GOD….my senses half-way came over me and a high school friend who was sitting nearby and my boyfriend were there. Maybe if Porsha had reinforcements on stage to talk her down she would’ve reacted differently…
The nation watched as Porsha was taunted by Kenya. All season, Kenya has had a way to push people’s buttons, it’s part of her personality. I’m not sure if she does it on purpose or if it’s subconscious, but either way, she seems to illicit the same type of response from other castmates.
Everyone seems to have Porsha’s back in this scenario. But the fact remains, she is facing criminal charges as a result of letting a person who really doesn’t matter, push her to the point of losing control. As I played back the details of that interaction with that chick in my head… I still kept thinking how I should’ve grabbed her, then the headlines started to fly through my head. The end result wouldn’t have been good at all! And for what, because I let some little chick who’s not in control of herself, take me out of character? At this point we have jobs, careers and goodness knows none of us want to deal with a mugshot! (But if you HAD to have one, you’d want it to look like Porsha’s right???:))
I’m sure Porsha regrets that moment based on the legal implications, but I also think a part of her is proud. For once, she stuck up for herself… she let the world see that she’s not a pushover. In fact, she will snatch you if you push her enough. While that has to be a good feeling, getting physical is not the answer. It never makes a situation better. I think she sees that now and won’t allow herself to be put in that predicament again… Hopefully it’s a lesson learned for both of them! I bet you Kenya won’t be using a bullhorn or a wand in anybody else’s face anytime soon! Since they are reality stars, it’s good for ratings I guess, their images aren’t really tainted and the consequences are not like what we would face.
So are you Porsha? I Know I could be… Remember girls to stay Supergorge and “Better than” the drama… the mean girls are waiting to bring you down!